Progress in part
so this morning i’m sitting in my computer room, with my ginormous cup of coffee, listening to some wonderful tunage by Ingrid Michaelson and Lenka, and i can’t help but think about several things.
1) i feel so different from some of the people i surround myself by.
2) i’m confused on a lot of different things at the moment.
3) i’m sitting next to a guitar and my greatest wish is to know how to play one day, but i don’t know where to start.
4) i have a terrible craving for some cheetos.
i don’t know why i feel so different from some of the people around me, i just do. its not even like i think i’m “better” than them, or they are “better” than me, i just feel…different. like i think differently. for example, if someone makes a comment about….anything. most of the time the person they are talking to will have something to say back. but me, at times i feel like there are a million things to say back, and i can’t narrow it down to any one certain comment….so screw it. and i don’t say anything.
i’m also so confused on so many things that are going on right now. and not even right now…just confused in general. i feel like mostly everyone around me is so happy to be mediocre. now, maybe the majority of people reading this will think, one of a few things: 1. does she mean me? 2. what makes her so much better to think she’s above mediocre? 3. or the typical “screw her”…..OK now that i have said what you are thinking because i’m pretty sure you thought at least one of those (and who knows if anyone is reading this anyway) let me say this…..i am sooo not satisfied with mediocrity. i want to make a difference in the world in however minuscule way i can. now other people, if you want to be mediocre….go right ahead. at least you know what you want. but i don’t. and i DO know that i will never be happy to just sit and let things happen. i want to be that person MAKING things happen. now, i don’t know how to do this yet. so i’ll keep looking.
i want to see things in the world, and learn how other people think. us as humans can be so fascinating, and i want to learn as much as i can. open-mindedness is such a great and amazing thing. i want to go to Spain and watch a bull fight, i want to go to china and walk the great wall, i want to go to Greece and see where the Olympics started, i want to go to Egypt and see the pyramids, i want to take a picture next to Stonehenge, and i want to witness first-hand the great migration of Serengeti in Tanzania. i want to understand why different people do what they do. why modern countries throw away water when other countries don’t have any, why us as humans are so greedy, why serial killers feel the need to kill, why nuns live their life for Christ. I want people to learn to support love in any form. just to name a few.
as for the guitar, if someone could teach me how to tune it, that would be a fantastic start. till then i will probably keep sitting and staring at it, wondering why there are six strings instead of five.
and cheetos? well its too early to eat cheetos while still feeling like a half-healthy human…so i will wait around noon. that seems like a socially acceptable time to eat them right? (and that is another thing i want to understand, social acceptance in its entirety.)
i promise my posts won’t always be this long-winded, deep, or otherwise boring to anyone that is not me, i just wanted to get some thoughts down and let people into my crazy mind on this beautiful Sunday morning!
and on a side note, thought i’d put a website on here that i find extremely cool and you can find some really neat stuff. its like an online marketplace and everything is handmade/vintage. www.etsy.com